My palms were never soft. If you ever held my hand you’d feel they’ve been chiseled and worked with.
They’re not fleshy, they’re not silken. They don’t possess any generic mark of femininity.
They are flat and pale. Like a slab of colorless granite. Green veins pulsate beneath my cold, pasty skin.
The upper terrain is rigged and rough, with blotches of sun burns I try to hide.
My palms are so even, so toned. There is no plumpness to denote that they were ever fostered or caressed.
So when you hold them, you might flinch, but you’ll come to know what years of struggle does to a pair of hands.
Because unlike other women, I never had a chance to be soft.
So yesterday I read an article on the internet called ’30 Annoying Things That Women do that Guys Hate’ (30-like really?). It was written by some guy who either had a century old grudge against the female gender OR had a recent heartbreak-who knows? But the amount of spite that his article presented, told me that he carried some real issues with women (prayers go out to his future girlfriend).
Anyway so I hadn’t really posted anything lately due to my arduous semester exams but now that they’re finally over, you all can
endure read my stuff again. So whilst I read that article I thought I should play my part in the Female Army and maybe write an antithesis for it since this issue has been a major topic of discussion when it comes to the stereotypical chasms of wars between the two great genders of humanity; Male and Female respectively. Here it goes!
I went ahead and asked ALL the female friends I had in my contact list as to what according to them were some of the hardships you go through in the charming process of ‘being a girl’. The replies I got were hilarious. I summed them up in 10 brief points!
- We have to be multitaskers; have to master cooking, a proper job AND to look presentable as well.
- Do you know how hard it is to get one of those ‘Good Hair Days’ and then try to maintain them throughout the day?
- We can’t come and conk off on a couch in a party;we have to master the ‘RIGHT POSTURE’ because apart from everything else-We ALSO have to be a lady!
- Getting those stupid legs waxed and shiny?
- Oh and yes-WE HAVE TO SMELL GOOD AS WELL.
- I don’t think any other gender understands how hard it is to go through the 5 day pain every month AND act perfectly normal about it.
- The wings of the left eye eyeliner are always ‘not-perfect’.
- Curling and straightening rods scare the crap out of me. THEY REALLY DO.
- It’s always hard and gawky for a girl to approach a guy. The drill says that the guy should ‘make the move’. So it attracts a lot of attention if a girl steps forward.
- We cannot be reckless. As in carefree. It’s genetically imbibed in us;we cannot ‘not care’ about people or things no matter how much we try. We tend to ponder over every small thing. Although it’s an innate quality but sometimes it turns out to be extremely exhausting.
So this is it. There-I said it all. Sometimes we might exasperate you boys and make you all think of all the painless suicide options-but we aren’t THAT bad. You might think we’re annoying and whiny and sometimes fairly obnoxious. (Psst ..not all of us are). But in honest defense, we go through the above things that are biologically programmed for US and so YOU, no matter how much you try, will not understand how tiresome it actually is (although we wish you did).
So after you’re done reading this, go and give your girlfriend/wife a bunch of flowers AND chocolates .. Oh and Gummy Bears too ..Oh Oh. .. and a box of Nutella maybe?
Okay-I’ll stop writing now.
If there’s anything you want me add, feel free to notify me in the comment box.